hypnovoyeur:

bannableoffense:

hypnovoyeur:

toodomforyou:

qkingrulingtheworld:

mxxn-kitten:

mxxn-kitten:

@ guys

Stop dming girls just saying “Hi”

And stop following it up with “how are you” or “wyd”

So what would you suggest to say to someone who you’re trying to get to know but it’s your first time talking to them?

Here’s my advice as a girl who has existed on sites like this and on dating sites. Note: this is just my take on it, I can’t speak for everyone.

First of all, introduce yourself. If it’s a dating site and you have a well written profile, then you don’t need much here. If it’s tumblr or something more nebulous, like kik, where I don’t have a distinct profile I can look at, give me a good introduction. I’ve had so many guys message me on kik, knowing a decent amount about me through my blog, whereas I’ve got nothing. Give me a name, an age, a general blurb about who you are.

Next, if you want to talk to me, bring up the thing that made you want to talk to me. On a dating site, I listed things about me on my profile. Bring those up. “Hey, I see you’re into video games – Civ 5 and Portal are some of my all time favorites too! What’ve you been playing recently? I’ve been playing a ton of Slime Rancher.”

On a place like tumblr, maybe it was a specific post that caught your eye. Talk to me about it. Tell me what you liked. Give me something that says, “I read your stuff and I appreciated it and I’d love to get to know you.” Bring up something I showed an opinion on. If someone posts a lot of pictures and doesn’t write much, you can talk about themes in their pictures that you appreciated, or similarities you two have. Don’t just hit on them, though. You can flirt — but do more than, “You’re hot.” Your flirting will be way more effective if you try to engage with us as a person you want to talk to, rather than a body you want to bang.

If you aren’t giving us any substance to work with, we have no incentive to respond. You were interested enough in me to message me, for whatever reason – give me a reason to message you back. Give me a reason to want to look at your profile and try to get to know you. “Hey” isn’t enough.

I hope this helps.

-SD

^this

this but for everyone messaging me

^also this

Please;;